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Cooking Up A Storm

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My wife says she enjoyed cooking, but you wouldn’t think so after tasting some of her creations.  We ate out so much because I wanted to escape some of the more outlandish specialties she’d prepare.  We often went to the local restaurants, so she could “get a break from the kitchen” as I politely put it.  But this custom came to a screeching halt when the tax man told me I was behind in tax payments.  The amount due, coupled with the fine, meant we had to cut our “treating budget” down to maybe one meal every two months.


What followed was pure terror.  Not only did I have to eat her cooking every day, but she took offense if I dared criticize it.  So finally I took it upon myself to start “messin’ around” in the kitchen.  I used a Groupon promo code to get some cookware from Bed, Bath and Beyond, bought a few elementary cookbooks, and started trying out some of the more basic recipes.


Well, you’d have thought I started a fire.  Suddenly she began acting like I’d invaded her private domain.  Of course, I wasn’t too good at first, making quite a mess and spilling stuff everywhere.  I burned food, broke dishes and wasted lots of expensive meat.  But I slowly got the hang of it and began to enjoy creating my own treats.  Meanwhile my wife smoldered at the thought that I was intruding in her turf.  But we were accomplishing two things – saving money and losing weight at the same time.  She refused to eat anything I cooked and I wouldn’t touch anything she threw together.  We therefore helped each other – she even started strutting about in her slinky outfits and sun dresses again.  And my doctor finally stopped telling me to lose weight.  But my wife drew the line when I took advantage of some Groupons to get more cooking equipment to expand my skills in the kitchen.  Now she claims I’m more interested in cooking than in her.  So I finally challenged her.  If she’s so afraid she will lose me because of her cooking, then I’d pay for her to take classes at a culinary school.  It’ll be worth much more than just a few Groupons to me if she agrees to try that!


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